pimpnamedraypeat
Member
- Joined
- Dec 25, 2014
- Messages
- 1,045
I appreciate the sympathy. It does mean a lot to me. Thank you.
I had 8 huge amalgam fillings replaced some years ago. The composites are probably full of BPA and not much better, and I probably got a solid dose of mercury from the drilling of the old fillings. I was not assertive enough to insist on proper procedures using air evac, etc., and just let them drill them out with no precautions to protect me (or them) from mercury vapor.
I had mercury filling as well. I went through the same experience as a child. I'm working to remove the mercury in my system with iodine, raw garlic, succinic acid from vitamin E succinate, cilantro, borax in water, c-salt buffered vitamin c and pectasol. I'm flushing the mercury out with lots of coffee, taurine, and orange juice and oranges as the citric acid helps flush out heavy metals.
That was the first one I read from Robertson that really hit me. This, to me, has always been very powerful, and relatable to anyone whether they believe in a god or not:
There is a Spirit which beareth witness with our spirits; there is a God who “is not far from any one of us;” there is a “Light which lighteth every man which cometh into the world.” Do not be unnaturally humble. The thought of your mind, perchance, is the thought of God. To refuse to follow that may be to disown God. To take the judgment and conscience of other men to live by, where is the humility of that? From whence did their conscience and judgment come? Was the fountain from which they drew exhausted for you? If they refuse like you to rely on their own conscience, and you rely upon it, how are you sure that it is more the mind of God than your own which you have refused to hear?
Look at it in another way. The charm of the words of great men - those grand sayings which are recognized as true as soon as heard - is this, that you recognize them as wisdom which has passed across your own mind. You feel that they are your own thoughts come back to you, else you would not at once admit them: “All that floated across me before, only I could not say it, and did not feel confident enough to assert it, or had not conviction enough to put it into words.” Yes, God spoke to you what He did to them: only they believed it, said it, trusted the Word within them, and you did not. Be sure that often when you say, “It is only my own poor thought, and I am alone,” the real correcting thought is this, “Alone, but the Father is with me;” therefore I can live that lonely conviction.
That's a beautiful quote I'm glad you shared that. No more will I doubt the inner light.
Anyway, back to the topic at hand: for me personally, the influence of serotonin on aggression/violence is clear as day, having been on those drugs myself, and having felt the effects.
I've been on DHEA the past few days and pregnenolone the past few weeks and already feel an extremely elevated sex drive. Also just feel more clear-headed and alive. (5mg dose daily).
Substances like these, for better or worse, have a huge effect on our mood. Of course upbringing plays a role in our actual behaviors. Perhaps I would've flipped out and been one of those mass killers if I had a different personality or something. Scary thought, but those drugs on many occasions made me feel like assaulting people, like I just needed one push over the edge.
The irony is that medications like these are given to people who are ALREADY STRUGGLING with social integration. It is clearly established that pleasure and pain have an inverse relation: as levels of connection and affection and intimacy rise, levels of violence go down. The most violent areas in the world are also areas most devoid of close knit communities, and affection as a normal everyday way of life.
Having my first girlfriend in my mid-late 20's really changed a lot for me. Perhaps romantic relationships are a substitute for what should be close-knit communities, but in today's world it is very hard to find any kind of regular affection or love outside of a romantic relationship, which is perhaps why so many people are lonely and crave romantic relationships, not realizing that they might also feel a lot better if they simply had more support in general, and people that could love and touch them in non-sexual ways.
Don't get me wrong, I am all about sex, and the importance of sex, but touch is a very general thing. I am not gay but I always felt closer to my male friends with any form of touch, which has been extremely rare in my life: a pat on the back, or someone putting their hand on my shoulder. I can only remember a couple times I've had a male friend do that to me. Perhaps it's rampant homophobia or something that makes these things taboo.
But I always feel closer to people with touch. When my grandparents were still alive I was always hugging them and putting my arm around them, rubbing their backs, etc.
So when you throw a chemical cocktail that promotes violence and aggression to people who are socially dysfunctional, starved of love, touch, acceptance, etc...you have a recipe for mass violence and disaster. It is just like playing a game of Russian Roulette in this scenario. You don't know if a person like that will end up going on a mass killing spree or simply commit suicide. I turned all my anger inwards and against myself and began self-mutilating and making suicide attempts; just another side of the coin. I was very angry at other people but always turned it against myself, but other people with different personalities or perspective just turn it against other people.
The real solution is abandoning drugs and using actually helpful substances like pregnenolone, DHEA, dietary improvements, sunlight, and most of all, having a way for people to integrate into society by way of love and affection and acceptance. There is no incentive for integration into society without those critical components.
This is all just a fantasy of course. I have no idea how this could actually be achieved in reality, but I know it's the solution. Of course, using helpful substances like Peat suggests already carries with it a sense of love and affection because the attention is being placed on the individual and their well-being, implying that they are worthy of being healthy, worthy of being respected as an individual, worthy of being cared for.
Not peddled drugs like a feedlot animal for profit. So even in using actual helpful substances, there is a filling of the love/affection void that is predominant today. Being recognized as a human being and an individual and being cared for by someone else -- anyone else -- is a critical step in healing. I truly believe a lot of people can be saved by this but unfortunately many people do not have the opportunity.
I too have always like touch among male friends. Arm around the shoulder, bro hug, etc. But everything is so homophobic like you said. In other cultures men will cuddle and hold each other without any shame or self awareness.
I can't remember the last time I was touched. Anglo society is so dead. Touch has something to do with calming down your sympathetic nervous system. I think some forms of autism can he reduced by touch. They're chronically hyperactivated sympathetic nervous system. I have been where you are with the raging thoughts and demonic thinking patterns. These drugs are as much a spiritual attack as they are chemical. Hard to believe but true. This world is run by satanists and you were exactly where they wanted you. It's good to see you've finding god or at least logos. Suffering has a way of bringing you to the light.