Feeling Terrible At 22 (f) Desperately Seeking Advice

[JazTee]

I'm late this thread and also historically a lurker, but wanted to pop in because you and I have very similar pasts and we've also been doing the Peat-inspired eating for similar amounts of time. You already have a ton of advice from people who have been doing this way longer than I have, but I'd add that making sure to check your temperature before doing anything physical, even walking, and then again 20 minutes after you've finished will help you get a good idea of how much your body can handle without getting stressed. I come from a semi-starvation background too and overexercised myself before starting this, but it was somewhat driven by the fact that exercising has always helped me process some of these mental health issues like body dysmorphia. So I understand how some movement feels important for mental sanity and managing the negative inner voices. Tracking temp and pulse has helped me do that without setting back any of my progress

I also just wanted you to know that someone else was here who struggles with body dysmorphia, too. It took me a long time to commit to this process. I was convinced, however illogically, that somehow I'd be the one person this process wouldn't work for. I was scared I would gain and gain and gain and never actually heal enough to ever stop gaining. I know that fear very well. You're not alone. You're also already so remarkably brave for being here and challenging that fear. I hope you can keep reminding yourself that your feelings are valid, but they're not facts when your body dysmorphia kicks up.

If you have the means, you may also want to consider a coach. Being accountable to someone else helps me push past my own fears that come up during the healing process. Kate Deering actually coaches people through this process -- I'm working with her now. It's been extremely helpful for someone with semi-encyclopedic knowledge on this stuff check my food logs, listen to my issues, and pinpoint things to help combat my issues specifically. (Like you, I also have lactic acid issues but I've also caused quite a few mineral deficiencies and imbalances she's helping me correct.)

But, mostly I just wanted to say, hi, we're in this together. You're not alone. There are people here cheering for you to heal and feel better and come out the other side. Keep pushing through!

Hi Linnechka - I can't thank you enough for this comment. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Am I alright to send you a direct message? x

 

[Linnechka]

Hi Linnechka - I can't thank you enough for this comment. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Am I alright to send you a direct message? x

Yes, of course!!

 

[JazTee]

UPDATE:

Hi guys. So for the last 4 nights or so, I've been sleeping like crap. I keep waking up in the night feeling really hot & sweaty and my heart is racing. I know this is cortisol spiking in my sleep - but I've noticed that this happens when I have a lot of sugar before bed too. Is it the sugar or is it not enough sugar d'ya think?

My diet yesterday:

Breakfast: skimmed milky coffee + 2tsp brown sugar, 1.5 eggs w/ tomato & spring onion, 1 medium banana

snack: pineapple, dates, grapes, warm sugary skim milk, homemade sweetened condensed milk ice cream

Lunch: lean ground beef w/ onion, 1c (well-cooked) basmati rice made with kale broth

** I noticed that when I started eating my snacks at around 12pm, I couldn't stop eating and I started binging. I ate all my snacks & lunch right after each other & felt really guilty.

snack: grapes, jelly, Pink Lady apple

Dinner: 2 slices Sourdough bread (1 with salted butter, cucumber, cheese, tomato; 1 with lemon curd)

snack (before bed): Hot chocolate with 0.5c skim milk, 2 tsp sugar.

The sourdough is not a regular occurance - just really wanted to try lemon curd (which is now my one true love). <3

---

I was also feeling really really down yesterday. I pretty much didn't move at all, and just felt like a sad little couch potato. I did accidentally end up doing a 15 mile hike on Sunday (got a bit lost so just had to keep walking) but I had PLENTY of food, like over 3,000 calories with lots of beef, potatoes, wine gums, warm sugary milk, grapes, dates, etc etc. So at the time I felt very well fueled and was never hungry or cold - and I was also extremely happy and felt like myself again mood wise. I felt okay on Monday too, very tired but still positive. Then yesterday I was just depressed like I usually am.

I'm still noticing that after I eat I get tired. It's like 30-40 minutes after eating I just lose all of my energy. Is this going to continue until my body finally starts to metabolise carbs instead of running on fat & stress? It's stressing me out, which is probably fueling the stress in my body even more.

The only thing that has changed from my diet in the past 2 days was that I ate bananas and apples(?). So I don't know if that is a reason for the sadness or if it's just my body adjusting to the new change. Still terrified of getting fat but continuing to eat +2,000kcal a day.

---

Anyway, hope everyone is having a great day.

- Jaz

 

[somuch4food]

** I noticed that when I started eating my snacks at around 12pm, I couldn't stop eating and I started binging. I ate all my snacks & lunch right after each other & felt really guilty.

Don't feel guilty for eating! Try to keep good snacks on hand and eat whenever you are hungry. You know that most animals eat and sleep most of the day. We shouldn't feel guilty about feeding ourselves. Enjoy the food you eat.

The trick is to have a good food supply around for when you need to binge.

 

[Maljam]

UPDATE:

Hi guys. So for the last 4 nights or so, I've been sleeping like crap. I keep waking up in the night feeling really hot & sweaty and my heart is racing. I know this is cortisol spiking in my sleep - but I've noticed that this happens when I have a lot of sugar before bed too. Is it the sugar or is it not enough sugar d'ya think?

My diet yesterday:

Breakfast: skimmed milky coffee + 2tsp brown sugar, 1.5 eggs w/ tomato & spring onion, 1 medium banana

snack: pineapple, dates, grapes, warm sugary skim milk, homemade sweetened condensed milk ice cream

Lunch: lean ground beef w/ onion, 1c (well-cooked) basmati rice made with kale broth

** I noticed that when I started eating my snacks at around 12pm, I couldn't stop eating and I started binging. I ate all my snacks & lunch right after each other & felt really guilty.

snack: grapes, jelly, Pink Lady apple

Dinner: 2 slices Sourdough bread (1 with salted butter, cucumber, cheese, tomato; 1 with lemon curd)

snack (before bed): Hot chocolate with 0.5c skim milk, 2 tsp sugar.

The sourdough is not a regular occurance - just really wanted to try lemon curd (which is now my one true love). <3

---

I was also feeling really really down yesterday. I pretty much didn't move at all, and just felt like a sad little couch potato. I did accidentally end up doing a 15 mile hike on Sunday (got a bit lost so just had to keep walking) but I had PLENTY of food, like over 3,000 calories with lots of beef, potatoes, wine gums, warm sugary milk, grapes, dates, etc etc. So at the time I felt very well fueled and was never hungry or cold - and I was also extremely happy and felt like myself again mood wise. I felt okay on Monday too, very tired but still positive. Then yesterday I was just depressed like I usually am.

I'm still noticing that after I eat I get tired. It's like 30-40 minutes after eating I just lose all of my energy. Is this going to continue until my body finally starts to metabolise carbs instead of running on fat & stress? It's stressing me out, which is probably fueling the stress in my body even more.

The only thing that has changed from my diet in the past 2 days was that I ate bananas and apples(?). So I don't know if that is a reason for the sadness or if it's just my body adjusting to the new change. Still terrified of getting fat but continuing to eat +2,000kcal a day.

---

Anyway, hope everyone is having a great day.

- Jaz

How much fat are you eating? It looks a very low fat diet. Fat slows the rise and fall of blood sugar. Some people when they eat loads of carbs and very little fat, their blood sugar rockets up and rockets back down, which can make you feel like you need to eat, however your body doesn't actually need the food, it is just an uncomfortable feeling. When I was eating very low fat many years ago I fell into this trap and gained a ton of weight trying to chase away the feeling of hunger. Adding even more sugar to the mix won't fix this issue.

Fat is incredibly beneficial, increases the absorption of the fat soluble vitamins, helps keep blood sugar stable and comfortable, binds endotoxins to chylomicrons to help the body neutralise them. Don't be afraid of fat, just factor it into your calories.

 

[JazTee]

How much fat are you eating? It looks a very low fat diet. Fat slows the rise and fall of blood sugar. Some people when they eat loads of carbs and very little fat, their blood sugar rockets up and rockets back down, which can make you feel like you need to eat, however your body doesn't actually need the food, it is just an uncomfortable feeling. When I was eating very low fat many years ago I fell into this trap and gained a ton of weight trying to chase away the feeling of hunger. Adding even more sugar to the mix won't fix this issue.

Fat is incredibly beneficial, increases the absorption of the fat soluble vitamins, helps keep blood sugar stable and comfortable, binds endotoxins to chylomicrons to help the body neutralise them. Don't be afraid of fat, just factor it into your calories.

Yesterday was quite a low fat day just naturally - but I had quite a lot of minced beef and the ice cream was very high in fat. Sunday & Monday I had a huge amount of beef joint which was quite fatty. I try to keep it around 50g-60g a day - just dependant on what I've got in. Like today I've had 1cup of whole milk, so currently lookng at 20-30g of fat so far, I'm just trying to follow what my body is naturally craving while I'm getting to understand it better. Trying to let go of as much control as I'm used to having.

I also cook everything with salted butter or coconut oil so I get a bit of fat in that way. I just have read a lot of things saying that high fat + high carb isn't a good idea(?) and will lead of excess fat gain. But I understand your point about it being a delicate balance - and fat is very satiating.

But I mean, my appetite is pretty ravenous no matter what I eat at the moment. I've just had a big lunch of the leftover rice from yesterday with courgettes, tomatoes, and oysters and I'm still hungry for more lol. I guess it's cos my body is still not metabolising food properly so it's needing more energy(?).

 

[JazTee]

Don't feel guilty for eating! Try to keep good snacks on hand and eat whenever you are hungry. You know that most animals eat and sleep most of the day. We shouldn't feel guilty about feeding ourselves. Enjoy the food you eat.

The trick is to have a good food supply around for when you need to binge.

haha that's a good point! Maybe I should think of myself as a bear going into hibernation. I woke up with really stiff and painful finger joints today so I'm really just gonna go for this 'all-in-but-not-excessive' method because I'm sick of feeling like an 80 year old woman. Actually, my 78 year old nan doesn't even get joint pain, so I can't even compare myself to her!

I've been really loving dates to snack on recently. Only tried them for the first time 2 weeks ago but they're just quite expensive considering I'll eat an entire pack in 2 days. I'm just really binging on fruit and jelly sweets, so at least it's a step up from any PUFA.

What snacks would you recommend?

 

[Vinny]

UPDATE:

Hi guys. So for the last 4 nights or so, I've been sleeping like crap. I keep waking up in the night feeling really hot & sweaty and my heart is racing. I know this is cortisol spiking in my sleep - but I've noticed that this happens when I have a lot of sugar before bed too. Is it the sugar or is it not enough sugar d'ya think?

My diet yesterday:

Breakfast: skimmed milky coffee + 2tsp brown sugar, 1.5 eggs w/ tomato & spring onion, 1 medium banana

snack: pineapple, dates, grapes, warm sugary skim milk, homemade sweetened condensed milk ice cream

Lunch: lean ground beef w/ onion, 1c (well-cooked) basmati rice made with kale broth

** I noticed that when I started eating my snacks at around 12pm, I couldn't stop eating and I started binging. I ate all my snacks & lunch right after each other & felt really guilty.

snack: grapes, jelly, Pink Lady apple

Dinner: 2 slices Sourdough bread (1 with salted butter, cucumber, cheese, tomato; 1 with lemon curd)

snack (before bed): Hot chocolate with 0.5c skim milk, 2 tsp sugar.

The sourdough is not a regular occurance - just really wanted to try lemon curd (which is now my one true love). <3

---

I was also feeling really really down yesterday. I pretty much didn't move at all, and just felt like a sad little couch potato. I did accidentally end up doing a 15 mile hike on Sunday (got a bit lost so just had to keep walking) but I had PLENTY of food, like over 3,000 calories with lots of beef, potatoes, wine gums, warm sugary milk, grapes, dates, etc etc. So at the time I felt very well fueled and was never hungry or cold - and I was also extremely happy and felt like myself again mood wise. I felt okay on Monday too, very tired but still positive. Then yesterday I was just depressed like I usually am.

I'm still noticing that after I eat I get tired. It's like 30-40 minutes after eating I just lose all of my energy. Is this going to continue until my body finally starts to metabolise carbs instead of running on fat & stress? It's stressing me out, which is probably fueling the stress in my body even more.

The only thing that has changed from my diet in the past 2 days was that I ate bananas and apples(?). So I don't know if that is a reason for the sadness or if it's just my body adjusting to the new change. Still terrified of getting fat but continuing to eat +2,000kcal a day.

---

Anyway, hope everyone is having a great day.

- Jaz

Priority: ANIMAL protein (from meat!) on EVERY meal.
Eat till satiated.
Ditch the coffee and all stimulants.
Sleep.
Rest.

(15 miles hike.... Gosh... Why did you do that?)

 

[Maljam]

Yesterday was quite a low fat day just naturally - but I had quite a lot of minced beef and the ice cream was very high in fat. Sunday & Monday I had a huge amount of beef joint which was quite fatty. I try to keep it around 50g-60g a day - just dependant on what I've got in. Like today I've had 1cup of whole milk, so currently lookng at 20-30g of fat so far, I'm just trying to follow what my body is naturally craving while I'm getting to understand it better. Trying to let go of as much control as I'm used to having.

I also cook everything with salted butter or coconut oil so I get a bit of fat in that way. I just have read a lot of things saying that high fat + high carb isn't a good idea(?) and will lead of excess fat gain. But I understand your point about it being a delicate balance - and fat is very satiating.

But I mean, my appetite is pretty ravenous no matter what I eat at the moment. I've just had a big lunch of the leftover rice from yesterday with courgettes, tomatoes, and oysters and I'm still hungry for more lol. I guess it's cos my body is still not metabolising food properly so it's needing more energy(?).

Yeah your body will be screaming for more calories as you keep increasing them based on your past history regardless of what you eat, I would just try to avoid compounding the issues with going very high carb and very low fat.

High carb and high fat would likely cause weight gain because it is very calorific. I don't think you could eat high of both and be within a reasonable amount of calories for most peoples level of activity. I am not convinced that high of either is more beneficial than being moderate of each. Of course it is up to you and you make your own decisions, I am just sharing my experiences.

Something around 30% of calories from fat I don't think is unreasonable.

haha that's a good point! Maybe I should think of myself as a bear going into hibernation. I woke up with really stiff and painful finger joints today so I'm really just gonna go for this 'all-in-but-not-excessive' method because I'm sick of feeling like an 80 year old woman. Actually, my 78 year old nan doesn't even get joint pain, so I can't even compare myself to her!

I've been really loving dates to snack on recently. Only tried them for the first time 2 weeks ago but they're just quite expensive considering I'll eat an entire pack in 2 days. I'm just really binging on fruit and jelly sweets, so at least it's a step up from any PUFA.

What snacks would you recommend?

Sorry to say this because I know you come from a period of restriction but I don't think binging on fruit and jelly sweets is going to give you health. Masses amounts of sugar on top of sugar I am not convinced improves health more than a moderate amount, many people try this and end up with many more issues down the line that they didn't have at the start. This happens time and time again on the forum. A balance in everything is important. Maybe more (goats) cheese, fatty meats, egg yolks, chocolate would bring about more benefits that just pounding carbs.

 

[Recoen]

UPDATE:

Hi guys. So for the last 4 nights or so, I've been sleeping like crap. I keep waking up in the night feeling really hot & sweaty and my heart is racing. I know this is cortisol spiking in my sleep - but I've noticed that this happens when I have a lot of sugar before bed too. Is it the sugar or is it not enough sugar d'ya think?

My diet yesterday:

Breakfast: skimmed milky coffee + 2tsp brown sugar, 1.5 eggs w/ tomato & spring onion, 1 medium banana

snack: pineapple, dates, grapes, warm sugary skim milk, homemade sweetened condensed milk ice cream

Lunch: lean ground beef w/ onion, 1c (well-cooked) basmati rice made with kale broth

** I noticed that when I started eating my snacks at around 12pm, I couldn't stop eating and I started binging. I ate all my snacks & lunch right after each other & felt really guilty.

snack: grapes, jelly, Pink Lady apple

Dinner: 2 slices Sourdough bread (1 with salted butter, cucumber, cheese, tomato; 1 with lemon curd)

snack (before bed): Hot chocolate with 0.5c skim milk, 2 tsp sugar.

The sourdough is not a regular occurance - just really wanted to try lemon curd (which is now my one true love). <3

---

I was also feeling really really down yesterday. I pretty much didn't move at all, and just felt like a sad little couch potato. I did accidentally end up doing a 15 mile hike on Sunday (got a bit lost so just had to keep walking) but I had PLENTY of food, like over 3,000 calories with lots of beef, potatoes, wine gums, warm sugary milk, grapes, dates, etc etc. So at the time I felt very well fueled and was never hungry or cold - and I was also extremely happy and felt like myself again mood wise. I felt okay on Monday too, very tired but still positive. Then yesterday I was just depressed like I usually am.

I'm still noticing that after I eat I get tired. It's like 30-40 minutes after eating I just lose all of my energy. Is this going to continue until my body finally starts to metabolise carbs instead of running on fat & stress? It's stressing me out, which is probably fueling the stress in my body even more.

The only thing that has changed from my diet in the past 2 days was that I ate bananas and apples(?). So I don't know if that is a reason for the sadness or if it's just my body adjusting to the new change. Still terrified of getting fat but continuing to eat +2,000kcal a day.

---

Anyway, hope everyone is having a great day.

- Jaz

I am not surprised that you had a bad day yesterday after a 15mi hike especially if it was at all challenging. I know you said you ate enough but from a muscular response alone, there’s a reason why 2 day DOMs are frequently discussed. Also, your body clearly needed way more food to make up for that and everything else going on, so it makes sense you’re ravenous. Are you able to find a place that you can hike for like 0.5mi; have a picnic, maybe read a good book, and enjoy the surroundings for a few hours; then hike out again? That’s what I meant by go on a nice hike.
Are you getting enough Ca?

 

[BigYellowLemon]

It sounds like your eating too low fat and are suffering anxiety for it. You might see a lot of people on here saying to eat super low fat, or use out of context quotes from Peat (when he said just a couple years ago that something like 30% of his diet is fat from animal sources), but don't listen to that. When pressed, they'll reveal what they really mean is unsaturated sources of fat, and if you dig into the forum you'll find loads of posts showing massive metabolism boosting benefits from palmitic and stearic acids (the two main long saturated fats in the diet).

I would up the saturated fats in the diet. Maybe don't try to replace calories with fat, but add fat to what you're already eating. Try to get the fat from butter, tallow/lard, chocolate products (cocoa butter is a good fat source according to Ray), and if you want a cheap source, palm oil is great too (and when unrefined, is a good source of vitamins E and A). Coconut oil can be good too but half of it is MCT's, and it can't truly replace all the other sources I mentioned).

I have no idea if this will hurt your weight loss efforts, but it will probably make you feel far less anxious. And from the sound of it, you don't really need to lose weight, what you need is a redistribution of weight to different areas.

Making sure vitamins and minerals are in high supply would also be a good idea. Chronometer your diet and fill in the gaps with supplements.

Finally, pregnenolone and progesterone especially could help with anxiety. Use bioidentical kind. And 5mg-15mg lithium orotate could also be helpful (also Peat approved, start with 5mg).

 

[wealthofwisdom]

Thanks so much for this comment. It's really resonated with me. I have been back and forth to A&E and the GP for years with nobody really helping me. Some Drs thought I was pre-diabetic which really freaked me out - and now they've found inflammation in my blood having arthritis symtoms, my health is quite worrying to me.

I really appreciate you taking the time to write this comment. Can I ask how long you would recommend not exercising for? I have really severe body dysmorphia, so the 10lbs that I have gained already is really causing me a lot of upset. I'm scared that my body won't stop gaining weight if I eat lots of calories & sugar while not exercising. 4 years ago, I weighed 165lbs, so will I just get back up to that weight? I wasn't exercising, but I was eating loads of gluten & junk food. I was absolutely miserable with my body back then (felt pretty terribly too) and I only start feeling mentally happier when I am at a body size I feel comfortable in. If I were to go back to eating more but with whole foods like fruit, gelatin, meat, etc, do you think I would gain the same amount of fat like I had?

When I exercise, I do feel better immediately and for the rest of the day I have raised energy levels. It's when I don't exercise that I absolutely tank. Is this because of raised adrenaline and cortisol from the exercise or is it something else, do you think?

I would love to sort out my digestion and health (mental and physical) problems, I'm just terrified I'm going to gain loads of weight and swap one problem for another. I also do modelling so have to be very careful with how much weight I actually gain if I'm repairing my metabolism. I've watched Stephanie Buttermore's video on her weight gain going "all-in" for a year, she gained 40+lbs before her body started to let go of the fat. Do you think my body needs to hold onto fat like she did even though I have a very healthy body fat percentage? Why are you suggesting to not exercise and eat more - I'm still a bit confused as to why it needs to stop completely?

Thanks so much.

I think Vinny has a point. Under eating and exercising lead to my adrenal crash. THAT SAID, it's important to listen to your own body. If you say that exercise makes you feel much better, that is really something to pay attention to. We all come from different places. If not exercising is going to lead you to further depression, and exercise makes you feel good then I say exercise. Mental health is a top priority too here, and it sounds like exercise is good for your mental health.

 

[gaze]

Be very cautious with apples and bananas , those can be irritating in people with weak intestines and cause insomnia. Also try to let go of your feelings of guilt when eating, our bodies are 10x smarter than our minds, and let it have its cravings. Also cooked and reheated rice turns into resistant starch which has significantly less glucose available for digestion. So if you a big meal of reheated rice, you arnt getting as many calories as you think . Resistant starch might also irritate the intestine, but I don’t want to fear you into cutting out a bunch of foods, I think you need to listen to ur body and eat anything you crave

 

[wealthofwisdom]

Also cooked and reheated rice turns into resistant starch which has significantly less glucose available for digestion. So if you a big meal of reheated rice, you arnt getting as many calories as you think . Resistant starch might also irritate the intestine, but I don’t want to fear you into cutting out a bunch of foods, I think you need to listen to ur body and eat anything you crave

I reaheat rice a lot. Is resistant starch a bad thing, aside from digestion issues?

 

[gaze]

I reaheat rice a lot. Is resistant starch a bad thing, aside from digestion issues?

not really if you have no ill effects, it can feed bacteria in susceptible people and promote serotonin. the main problem is if your using rice as a form of glucose, because alot of the glucose is undigestible. Its why all the low carb people say resistant starch is ok, because it doesn't spike insulin because the glucose doesn't get digested and instead resists digestion until it feeds bacteria in the colon and intestine if you have sibo. so it has less calories that you can use for energy basically

 

[wealthofwisdom]

I reaheat rice a lot. Is resistant starch a bad thing?

not really if you have no ill effects, it can feed bacteria in susceptible people and promote serotonin. the main problem is if your using rice as a form of glucose, because alot of the glucose is undigestible. Its why all the low carb people say resistant starch is ok, because it doesn't spike insulin because the glucose doesn't get digested and instead resists digestion until it feeds bacteria in the colon and intestine if you have sibo. so it has less calories that you can use for energy basically

Thanks for answering, I didn't know any of that. I don't really think in terms of "glucose", just in terms of carbs, fats, proteins, calories (plus vitamins, minerals, etc). I know this is going to be the most peat noobie question ever, but why would I be trying to use anything as a form of glucose, specifically? Just for energy?

 

[JazTee]

Hi everyone,

Sorry for the delay in getting back to you and responding to everyone. I really appreciate you taking the time to comment on my updates.

I understand the 15 mile hike was pretty stupid. We got stuck up there so we just had to carry on walking. I should have absolutely planned our route in advance (which, in fairness we did but we had to abandon that route because it was too boggy!) and yeah I'll definitely take it much slower and steadier in future walks. I don't get to see much greenery here where I live, so when I get to go in nature I tend to go a bit OTT on it. I grew up in Cumbria (check out The Lake District, it's beautiful) so moving to a grey city has affected me more than I would like to admit in regards to nature.

I totally hear what you're saying on the low-fat & sugar. I have noticed the more sugar I have, the more sugar I crave and the bigger my crashes seem to be through the day. I tend to rely on sugar as an easy snack instead of making a proper rich & diverse meal. I'm trying to find a delicate balance with my eating disordered mind and try to tell myself that this ISN'T a binge period, that this is a re-feeding period and that I still need to be sensible with what I eat - and that it isn't a free for all. I've been focusing more on beef & potatoes for meals recently and I do feel like I can eat a lot and not feel too wired or sluggish after. I am eating 2 eggs a day, so healthy fats & protein. I drink about 4 cups of warm skimmed milk every day with either brown sugar or honey. I have cut back on the dates & fruit somewhat because I was absolutely just eating them instead of making a meal. I am still eating the jelly sweets but I have locked them away in my boyfriend's car so I don't just reach for them whenever I get the urge to eat.

I cook everything in either butter or coconut oil - and I'm getting less scared of adding the fats back to my diet. I was eating like 40-50g a day of fat on a "bad" day. But, for now, I've stopped counting calories & tracking because I was starting to focus on it a little bit too much. I want to focus on eating intuitively and eat what my body is craving (but not in the forms of bad sweets/lazy meals). I actually put a teaspoon of coconut oil in my (DECAF) coffee the other day. I have stopped having caffinated coffee most days too, I just felt a bit too wired and it would give me headaches, and it never helped my fatigue that much anyway.

In terms of exercising, I'm starting daily walks of 40 minutes or so. Just around the block, canals, or local park. It's nothing too strenuous because I may have caused some damage to my tendons doing that huge walk the other week and I may or may not have spent the past week not being able to wear shoes or walk without pain... maybe. :l Learnt my lesson the hard way I think. And yeah, you're right YellowLemon, I should be looking at fat redistribution instead of weight loss. I don't have fat in the areas that would make me look more womanly - like it's not in my boobs or bum, but more in my legs and midsection, so I should be focusing on gaining the right fat in the right way in order for it to the right places, if that makes sense? Would sorting my metabolism fix this, do you think? Or do you think it's with eating the right kind of saturated fat that would cause this change?

ALSO UPDATE ON HEALTH:

I also went to the hospital today where I got diagnosed with Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, which explains a lot of my symptoms - like extreme fatigue, constipation, and joint pain. I have posted a thread here: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome Help? so if anyone has any ideas, I'd love to hear them and how I can help my body heal from everything. From what I understand, it's a pretty rare genetic condition, but I don't know what Peat thinks about genetic conditions. I don't know if it means that I'm f**ked or if it's just a blanket diagnosis and it's not actually genetic and the drs are wrong?

****

Can I just say a huge thank you to all of you for supporting me and helping me the past couple of weeks? I don't have the biggest support network and my parents take my health with a pinch of salt (ie: saying I haev a migraine when I had severe concussion and had to go to A&E twice lol), so it is really really helping to feel less alone in all of this. I feel like I'm finally being understood and heard, and I can't thank you enough!

Have a great day everyone x

 

[Recoen]

Hi everyone,

Sorry for the delay in getting back to you and responding to everyone. I really appreciate you taking the time to comment on my updates.

I understand the 15 mile hike was pretty stupid. We got stuck up there so we just had to carry on walking. I should have absolutely planned our route in advance (which, in fairness we did but we had to abandon that route because it was too boggy!) and yeah I'll definitely take it much slower and steadier in future walks. I don't get to see much greenery here where I live, so when I get to go in nature I tend to go a bit OTT on it. I grew up in Cumbria (check out The Lake District, it's beautiful) so moving to a grey city has affected me more than I would like to admit in regards to nature.

I totally hear what you're saying on the low-fat & sugar. I have noticed the more sugar I have, the more sugar I crave and the bigger my crashes seem to be through the day. I tend to rely on sugar as an easy snack instead of making a proper rich & diverse meal. I'm trying to find a delicate balance with my eating disordered mind and try to tell myself that this ISN'T a binge period, that this is a re-feeding period and that I still need to be sensible with what I eat - and that it isn't a free for all. I've been focusing more on beef & potatoes for meals recently and I do feel like I can eat a lot and not feel too wired or sluggish after. I am eating 2 eggs a day, so healthy fats & protein. I drink about 4 cups of warm skimmed milk every day with either brown sugar or honey. I have cut back on the dates & fruit somewhat because I was absolutely just eating them instead of making a meal. I am still eating the jelly sweets but I have locked them away in my boyfriend's car so I don't just reach for them whenever I get the urge to eat.

I cook everything in either butter or coconut oil - and I'm getting less scared of adding the fats back to my diet. I was eating like 40-50g a day of fat on a "bad" day. But, for now, I've stopped counting calories & tracking because I was starting to focus on it a little bit too much. I want to focus on eating intuitively and eat what my body is craving (but not in the forms of bad sweets/lazy meals). I actually put a teaspoon of coconut oil in my (DECAF) coffee the other day. I have stopped having caffinated coffee most days too, I just felt a bit too wired and it would give me headaches, and it never helped my fatigue that much anyway.

In terms of exercising, I'm starting daily walks of 40 minutes or so. Just around the block, canals, or local park. It's nothing too strenuous because I may have caused some damage to my tendons doing that huge walk the other week and I may or may not have spent the past week not being able to wear shoes or walk without pain... maybe. :l Learnt my lesson the hard way I think. And yeah, you're right YellowLemon, I should be looking at fat redistribution instead of weight loss. I don't have fat in the areas that would make me look more womanly - like it's not in my boobs or bum, but more in my legs and midsection, so I should be focusing on gaining the right fat in the right way in order for it to the right places, if that makes sense? Would sorting my metabolism fix this, do you think? Or do you think it's with eating the right kind of saturated fat that would cause this change?

ALSO UPDATE ON HEALTH:

I also went to the hospital today where I got diagnosed with Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, which explains a lot of my symptoms - like extreme fatigue, constipation, and joint pain. I have posted a thread here: Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome Help? so if anyone has any ideas, I'd love to hear them and how I can help my body heal from everything. From what I understand, it's a pretty rare genetic condition, but I don't know what Peat thinks about genetic conditions. I don't know if it means that I'm f**ked or if it's just a blanket diagnosis and it's not actually genetic and the drs are wrong?

****

Can I just say a huge thank you to all of you for supporting me and helping me the past couple of weeks? I don't have the biggest support network and my parents take my health with a pinch of salt (ie: saying I haev a migraine when I had severe concussion and had to go to A&E twice lol), so it is really really helping to feel less alone in all of this. I feel like I'm finally being understood and heard, and I can't thank you enough!

Have a great day everyone x

I was diagnosed with the “trifecta” hEDS (so many shoulder dislocations), POTs, and MCAS. Unfortunately many women seem to be diagnosed with these now. That leads me to believe it’s an environmental/ metabolism issue. For hEDS many so great with the Cusack protocol. My full dislocations and subluxations have stopped following RP’s principles- B vitamins, enough protein, and collagen were huge for me. My connective tissue is also stronger which has helped in my lifting so I can put on muscle again. RP has talked about low metabolism laying down too much collagen. I think is a huge factor behind all these hypermobile issues nowadays.

 

[JazTee]

UPDATE: MARCH 2021

Hi guys - had a very long break from this thread! I just wanted to get back in touch and give you some updates and say thanks for all your advice.

I basically decided to go "all-in" from Sep-November where I wasn't counting calories, focusing on beef/fish/chicken for most meals and lowered my cruciferous vegetable intake too. I was drinking more milk than I ever had and I also lowered my coffee intake. I kept to eating oysters & liver (not together) once a week and limited my gluten intake and ate mainly well cooked potatoes for starches. I also added a teaspoon of gelatine in my coffees & milks. I also started supplementing Vitamin D, aspirin & would take niacinimide (like >100mg) regularly but not every day.

FROM SEP-NOV A FEW THINGS HAPPENED:

I gained weight. I gained over 14lbs in total which was pretty devastating to my mental health. I stopped exercising completely and would only go for walks & hikes. I kept getting recurring tendon pain - to the point where it was AGONY. I was still feeling incredibly lethargic, especially after food. I took this as my cortisol lowering and my metabolism being too sluggish to keep up.

I gained a wrist injury which is still bothering me nearly 8 months later, feels like an electric bolt going down my wrist whenever I twist it wrong or put weight on it. Not good.

I also got an ultrasound scan on my lower body as I was getting pulsating pain in my legs that would wake me up at night and eventually got diagnosed with very high inflammation around my glute muscles and lower back.

My acne improved somewhat but didn't go away. I was still feeling extremely fatigued and waking up boiling hot every. single. night. No matter if I had salt, sugar, protein, or nothing before bed I would wake up feeling like I was drowning in my own sweat. I wouldn't sleep very well at all.

So, marginal improvement (?)

NOV - DEC UPDATES:

So now this is where I messed up. I quit my old job where I had sustained the injury (I think it's repetetive strain) and got myself a new job WFH. I thought it'd be great to heal as there'd be no more running around and lifting heavy things.

Lol.

I was so stressed from that job, literally glued at my desk from 8:30am - 8:30pm most days with ONE 30 minute break. I didn't have time to make myself lunch so I went back to eating very little, snacking on cheap nasty chocolate & sweets. TMI but I was having terrible diarrhoea every single day and I was shaking with stress for most of the day. Went back to eating gluten and all the bad junk food I'd worked so hard to wean myself off from.

It was absolutely awful and I pretty much went back to square one. Acne came back FULL FORCE and PMDD was terrible. Wanted to die 1 week of the month until Feb.

DEC - FEB UPDATES:

Now this is where the progress starts to happen. So I was in awful awful pain with my feet, hands, wrist, back, literally everything. In January I got diagnosed with inflammed tendons and they wanted to put me on anti-inflammatories. I said no to those, obviously.

In the meantime I was spending a lot of time reading on hypothyroid, oestrogen dominance, adrenal fatigue, the standard Peat things. Still very concerned about my metabolism being ridiculously slow & having no muscle tone whatsoever.

My boyfriend started a fitness challenege where he was trying to gain as much muscle as possible in 6 weeks so he started working out every single day and eating very clean. I had no muscle tone, gained a lot of fat that wasn't shifting, and so I decided to finally start exercising again.

5:30 am starts every single morning and cold showers throughout Feb as a personal challenge for myself. Sat in ice water for 2 minutes to celebrate my 23rd birthday lol.

I started jogging in short bursts, like doing sprints but my asthma is too bad to do them. I started great but 3 weeks in I was getting TERRIBLE tendon pain in my hips and my knees were really bad so had to stop doing that. I was doing a butt workout 2x a week with 16kg dumbells and resistance bands, but that was also causing bad tendon pain so also had to stop that. I then tried some HIIT workouts but my wrist was too bad to support myself on so, again, had to stop.

I was exercising at least 4x a week in total, more like 5-6x so was probably pushing my body too much again.

I was still sleeping terribly, I would only get 1 full night's sleep a week when I'd be too exhausted to wake up in the night. I tried different mattresses and pillows, even slept on the sofa for a bit in a bid to get any sleep.

My diet was 2 eggs in the morning with turkey bacon, or chicken sausages, all fried with coconut oil. I'd eat lots of rice & well cooked potatoes etc. Milk, orange juice, and was taking 2,000 IU/D of vitamin D every single day. I also started taking 2x aspirin a day.

Very small improvements in acne and mood. Not so sad that I'd get completely stuck in the sadness, so that's good! I

MARCH UPDATES:

That brings us to March 2021!

I have had 5 full nights of sleep! Woo!

Granted, I'm still feeling very fatigued in the afternoon, but I'M SLEEPING!

I haven't exercised in a week and my wrist pain is more manageable.

A few things I've changed in March. NO FORITFIED WHITE BREAD - ONLY ANCIENT GRAINS LIKE RHYE, SPELT, ETC.

A carrot salad DAILY.

Morning walks in the SUNSHINE (Jan & Feb was in the dark) doing around 10,000 steps a day.

Liver 1x this week and oyster twice.

And the biggest change has been MORE COFFEE. I used to drink 2 small cups every day but now I drink at least 3-4 cups of coffee with sugar and with a meal. My hands are warmer and my sleep has honestly been great the past 5 nights. My feet are warm when I go to sleep now which is a huge change. My feet used to be absolutely FREEZING!

MY MENTAL CHANGES:

I actually undersand how much ABUSE and TRAUMA I put my own body through as well as the physical effects of the trauma I suffered as a child. I understand where all this pain is coming from and why it's taking so long to heal.

I have started a business teaching confidence and positive action to young people. I will eventually branch into speaking about my own experiences with bullying, grooming & abuse, and mental health journey at some point too. My goals for the future are to hopefully help adults with my problems that aren't finding therapy helpful & to empower them to take positive, healthy control over their minds and life.

Mentally, I'm still unhappy with my body but I'm treating it with much more kindness. I obviously don't like the fat on my hips and having a completely non-existent booty from the side (no matter how much I work it, it doesn't wanna grow lol), BUT I understand WHY it's there. So I'm working around it. I would really like it for my body to let go of the fat stores and start building muscle, but I don't know when that's going to happen. I have the very typical "hypothyroid body" where I have this ring of fat around my middle that just never dissapears. Sooo.... eh.

I've also been going to coaching sessions and I'm attending a self-love seminar on Wednesday so I'm really looking forward to that.

I've bought some casein protein which I'll try later on tonight! I'm then going to look at Thiamin, (or just a B vitamin complex) and I'm really leaning to Progesterone as the last time I had clear skin and no PMDD symptoms was when I was on Dianette when I was 16. It's combined pill which is made with Progesterone & Pestrogen (is that just oestrogen?). It also has androgen blockers but I won't be doing any of that.

I saw some Raw Thryoid Glanduar, Metavive III which apparently has ribonucleotides from yeast which looks okay? Metavive III Bovine Thyroid Complex 180 capsules by Procepts Nutrition Ltd But I'd rather try Progesterone first.

So far that's all the changes. I'm feeling more like a person now and less like a hollowed out impression. I'm still tired BUT I'm hoping it's just a lag from the chronic illness I've been survivng with for so long.

For the first time in 3 years I have slept for 5 nights in a row!!

So yeah! Really excited for the future. I know I'll be able to stop my pain and get better than my previous normal by keeping this up and constantly being motivated to make the right decisions.

----

Thank you all for your amazing help. Hopefully by this time next month I'll be feeling even better! Can you imagine an ENTIRE MONTH of sleeping well?!??

Have a fantastic day xx

 

[Peatness]

Posted this on your thread about ehlers danlos. ED is complex so I'm not suggesting this is necessarily the cause

I came across this blog about Stephanie Seneff's work on glyphosate. In this passage quoted in the blog Seneff associates glyphosate with collagen damage

I feel confident that glyphosate is messing up collagen,” Seneff says. “Collagen has a beautiful triple helix structure, which gives it really special properties of tensile strength and flexibility to hold water. Collagen has long, long sequences called GXY, GXY, GXY, where every third amino acid is a glycine. Those glycines hook together to form that triple helix.

There are people who have mutations in those glycines that cause joint and bone diseases, and I think glyphosate is causing that. Ehlers-Danlos syndrome is associated with glycine mutations in collagen, and there’s an increase in the prevalence of that syndrome recently.

Of course, you have many more people getting hip replacement surgery, and people have back issues, back pain and shoulder surgery, knee and foot problems. All these different problems with the joints, I suspect, are being caused by misfolded collagen because of glyphosate messing it up.”

‘Toxic Legacy’ — How Glyphosate Destroys Your Health

Stephanie Seneff, Ph.D., a senior research scientist at MIT, has published a new book, “Toxic Legacy: How the Weedkiller Glyphosate Is Destroying Our Health and the Environment” — without doubt the…

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