LuMonty
Member
- Joined
- Mar 8, 2019
- Messages
- 426
TL;DR at the bottom.
I've been putting off this write-up for awhile, and it's a good thing I did. Due to a very recent revelation, I believe I have made the connections in my health needed. It makes writing this log easier, as I can remove several details and sections that would bloat the main point. I'll try to include the most relevant events in my life that relate to Peat's main points.
When I was very young I had bad ear and sinus problems. Tonsils and adenoids were removed at an early age. Also, very bad nightmare started when I was 3. These problems still affect me.
I hit puberty when I was 8, maybe closer to 9 years old. Overweight, being fed nearly everything that could be labeled anti-Peat, it was incredibly stressful. This was compounded by the beginning of extensive orthodontic work, which left me in a great amount of pain until quite recently (I'm 26 now). Starting around that age, I also began ruminating excessively, which continues until the present.
Amazoniac added this RP quote and I think it's fitting:
"Low thyroid function, relative over-feeding, and the presence of unsaturated oils in the diet are known to accelerate sexual maturity."
Thereafter, my mother decided that the family was on a new diet. Salt was seen as evil, and portions were kept small. I think it was called the "weigh-down diet." The problem was, at that point, I already needed calories at a rate that those portions couldn't satiate. From recent experience I assume my rapidly worsening anger was due to sugar and salt problems. These made my sleep even worse.
Eventually, I had a breakdown as a teenager. Since then, my mental abilities, which were once acute, are nearly non-existent. I went from perfect grades to staring at tests I had studied for and completing almost no work. Though much later in relation to this event, I recall staring at my Calculus 3 exam like I had never even taken Calc 1. While it may sound pretentious, my intelligence and problem solving abilities are a core part of me, and it wears deeply upon me to be without them.
More to that time frame, I became even more sick. Staph and strep infections left me with scar tissue in my throat. Combined with my small mouth from the ortho work, doctors guess this is when my sleep apnea began, but I declined before (I have a different theory, which I explain below).
From that time, around 15-17 years of age, I don't recall much. Up until then I was a runner, usually running 3/4 a mile a day, maybe up to 1.5 as I got older, in separate chunks. I started weight lifting around 16, which helped my well-being, but in retrospect I suspect for both activities my calorie intake wasn't sufficient.
I suffered an injury to my right hamstrings/knee my last day in the weight room in high school. I've been without pain in it for 2 weeks now, the longest stretch yet.
Otherwise, I only remember struggling to be social and function much at all. College was a nightmare for several reasons, and despite eating when I could, I didn't really improve. Eventually, due to grade issues and my health being worse than ever, I dropped out.
I was put on Zoloft and my appetite increased. A silver lining, to be sure; no one close to me believed me about the zaps and weird thoughts, but this year a family member confided in me he had the same problems.
I improved some, went back to college, and dropped out again. That's when I was diagnosed with Obstructive Sleep Apnea. I was also mentally evaluated with some BS condition, and put on Risperidone. In another thread, I related how it was the only medication I was allowed. The nurse practitioner put me on lamotrigine at one point, which was amazing (I understand now it's not good long-term, if at all). I would only learn later that she had me increase the dose too rapidly to be safe, and as it happened I was put back on risperidone. My prolactin continued to climb, and it was the last time my testosterone tested about 300, though I don't care to have it tested now. My therapist was useless and the jovial-cynical type; I stopped seeing him for several reasons.
During that period, I also saw an allergist and discovered I had several allergies. The allergist, an astute man of long practice, hadn't seen someone with my strange mix and number of allergies. Seeing as I use a similar nickname on other media, I don't mind listing them: lavender, strawberries, oregano, basil, sage, and tuna. I'm assuming the allergies are why my digestion is so compromised.
By this point I was in my 20s and had no idea why my health wouldn't improve; I was still following mainstream recommendations, which seemed full of holes. Despite my issues, I got a basic job, met a girl, and married her almost two years ago. With her help, I weaned off the risperidone (my last prolactin test before weaning was over 30, T was a bit above 200). I remain somewhat zombified as if I was still taking it. As FrankDee mentioned in a recent psychiatry thread, he compared psych meds to lobotomy, and I certainly feel lobotomized. No compound seems to affect my dopamine, but on rare occasion large amounts (1.2-2g) of caffeine works, but it's not sustainable.
In August of 2018, I was searching DuckDuckGo for silly (or maybe not) phrases about doctors and current medicine being foolish guesswork. I ended up here and spent my days off reading. Soon after, I quit my job. I couldn't eat even 2000 calories a day working a physical job due to a hiatal hernia, despite losing most of the extra weight and following other protocols (luckily I read what Haidut said about PPIs and only used one for 2 days).
There isn't much that helps me with CO2 (which was nearly zero along with NO when I got tested for allergies). Thiamine makes me feel awful as a supplement (from OJ is great though). Famotidine helps, I take 40mg a day but more makes me super sick. Increasing NO, which isn't considered Peatish, makes me function. For the near future, because I can't be picky, I'll be continuing with citrulline and agmatine. The theobromine in dark chocolate helps enough where I don't also take arginine anymore. I can't stomach enough fat from dark chocolate, though I love it, to get the vasodilating effect from it alone. I've read threads here and what Ray says about NO, so my current goal is to stop needing the stuff. That said, NO production alone or high potassium intake alone don't get my kidneys working as well as the two together. Also, without increasing NO my digestion remains at a near standstill. It's the only think that gets my digestion moving without inducing obscene amounts of diarrhea.
I don't seem to tolerate any decent amount of salt. I love salt. But if I have much at all (more than 1g a day), I get super flushed, my nose closes up, and my breathing becomes greatly compromised. My mood darkens even before the respiratory functions change. Anger follows, then restlessness and ADHD-like symptoms. I'll eat a salty meal, to taste, and spend the evening wondering why 1-3 hours have passed every time I look at a clock.
Low potassium has landed me in the emergency room once for sure, though I suspect another time as well. A ratio of 5g:1g, potassium to sodium, is what I'm working with right now. Up until this week, it was about 4:4. With the new ratio, I dumped a bunch of extra water. I can see my jawline, and can feel the ridge at the back of my skull; this for the first time since I was 20. Sometimes throughout the day, I can do something besides remain sedentary. Pulse went from low (~40bpm) or high (~110bpm) erratically to a consistent 90bpm. The change in sodium intake is also the only thing that stopped the bloating I had for the last 6 years.
If I recline too long, I can become immobile, which happens more easily with less potassium and/or more sodium. Apparently, a condition exists where those with it who recline a certain amount can cause potassium levels to drop to almost nothing or zero, but the amount in the body stays the same; this causes loss of muscle tone and even muscle damage if it happens enough. Considering my pulmonologist can't see a reason I have OSA (he also doesn't know how I'm alive since I was waking up once a minute at night; seems to be one of the good ones), this is the theory I'm working with. I have slept without my CPAP face down, but I have to use to thing a certain amount each night or I lose it due to non-compliance. The best sleep I had in recent memory was before the machine, I was on D3 and calcium for my SAD. My doctor then told me to stop taking them and that bad things would happen if I didn't.
This reclining-potassium would make sense for me, as it would explain my growing weakness over the years, as well as my CPAP issues. If the CPAP pressure is enough that I can sleep on my back, I wake up alert but not refreshed (probably adrenaline). At that pressure, in any other position I swallow too much air and can't sleep. If the pressure is low enough for other sleep positions, and if I end up on my back, I wake up with my throat open (no sputtering like without the machine during back sleep, contrary to my diagnosis), but I feel as if I went without the CPAP at all. I can feel my throat is open, but for whatever reason I wake up with the same headache as without it. The difference in pressure between the two is large, 20ish for being able to sleep on my back, 7-9 otherwise. My insurance doesn't cover BiPAP and I can't afford one. Losing weight hasn't helped, though I'm glad I have, also put on more muscle.
My current routine is lots of rest and the following diet:
Beef liver for breakfast, with the only caffeine I have, either Red Bull of coffee.
Followed after by berries (red raspberries right now) with maple syrup.
OJ throughout the day, sometimes with dark chocolate; usually about 60oz OJ, 1-2 oz dark chocolate. Skim milk when I can stomach it, 6-18oz. Both better than when I started.
Lunch is whatever meat I have, usually beef, more OJ, and either fruit and maple, or dark chocolate according to craving.
I do better on high protein, but can't have much caffeine if I do. Always pee clear if either is high or much of either together. I miss having more coffee, but it's too harsh.
Nettle tea if I start to feel kidney pain, 4-12oz total, usually only twice a week. It does seem to be estrogenic, but my overall health improves enough for the tradeoff. If I don't filter well enough, I get worse estrogenic/serotonergic symptoms within a day. If I can maintain high enough potassium levels, I'll experiment with eliminating it for a week.
If I need more protein, I have it for dinner. Warm milk for protein is better for sleep, even skim, so I usually drink more milk at night than day but the amount is far off of what Pet recommends.
I have gelatin, but don't use it often. It makes me feel nauseous and constipated. Also can't sleep if I have it, even in the morning. I'll feel calm for an hour and then like crap for at least 24hrs after.
Starch doesn't agree with me. Potatoes can in small amounts deep-fried, but it's not worth the trouble to do it myself. Well cooked noodles or potatoes result in day/night long heartburn and digestive slowdown. I know Ray says starches should be avoided, but the extra calories can be tempting, as well as the potassium and protein from potatoes. Also, fruit is poor quality and generally expensive.
I'm also concerned because the right side of my throat feels numb around my thyroid. Need to find out if it's a nodule. My mom and her mom had thyroid problems. I'm not sure if I want to mess with anything, T3 doesn't seem to have an effect and I'm not clear on what to try that will be benign if it's not a nodule.
TL;DR
Current goals:
*Get enough vasodilation so I don't have to mess with NO.
*Get potassium up enough so I can function properly
*Get sleep figured out
*Consume enough macros at the least, try to get calories above 2000 without starch
*Current diet is red meat, liver, dark chocolate, OJ, skim milk, lots of fruits, maple syrup
*In general, break lifelong stress cycle
*26 year old guy, 5'7" about 160 but feel 50+ and much heavier
*Find out if throat problem is scar tissue or thyroid nodule
*Figure out why salt wrecks me, even according to cravings
*No recent tests due to several problems with insurance; local doctors also typically refuse to test me
I've been putting off this write-up for awhile, and it's a good thing I did. Due to a very recent revelation, I believe I have made the connections in my health needed. It makes writing this log easier, as I can remove several details and sections that would bloat the main point. I'll try to include the most relevant events in my life that relate to Peat's main points.
When I was very young I had bad ear and sinus problems. Tonsils and adenoids were removed at an early age. Also, very bad nightmare started when I was 3. These problems still affect me.
I hit puberty when I was 8, maybe closer to 9 years old. Overweight, being fed nearly everything that could be labeled anti-Peat, it was incredibly stressful. This was compounded by the beginning of extensive orthodontic work, which left me in a great amount of pain until quite recently (I'm 26 now). Starting around that age, I also began ruminating excessively, which continues until the present.
Amazoniac added this RP quote and I think it's fitting:
"Low thyroid function, relative over-feeding, and the presence of unsaturated oils in the diet are known to accelerate sexual maturity."
Thereafter, my mother decided that the family was on a new diet. Salt was seen as evil, and portions were kept small. I think it was called the "weigh-down diet." The problem was, at that point, I already needed calories at a rate that those portions couldn't satiate. From recent experience I assume my rapidly worsening anger was due to sugar and salt problems. These made my sleep even worse.
Eventually, I had a breakdown as a teenager. Since then, my mental abilities, which were once acute, are nearly non-existent. I went from perfect grades to staring at tests I had studied for and completing almost no work. Though much later in relation to this event, I recall staring at my Calculus 3 exam like I had never even taken Calc 1. While it may sound pretentious, my intelligence and problem solving abilities are a core part of me, and it wears deeply upon me to be without them.
More to that time frame, I became even more sick. Staph and strep infections left me with scar tissue in my throat. Combined with my small mouth from the ortho work, doctors guess this is when my sleep apnea began, but I declined before (I have a different theory, which I explain below).
From that time, around 15-17 years of age, I don't recall much. Up until then I was a runner, usually running 3/4 a mile a day, maybe up to 1.5 as I got older, in separate chunks. I started weight lifting around 16, which helped my well-being, but in retrospect I suspect for both activities my calorie intake wasn't sufficient.
I suffered an injury to my right hamstrings/knee my last day in the weight room in high school. I've been without pain in it for 2 weeks now, the longest stretch yet.
Otherwise, I only remember struggling to be social and function much at all. College was a nightmare for several reasons, and despite eating when I could, I didn't really improve. Eventually, due to grade issues and my health being worse than ever, I dropped out.
I was put on Zoloft and my appetite increased. A silver lining, to be sure; no one close to me believed me about the zaps and weird thoughts, but this year a family member confided in me he had the same problems.
I improved some, went back to college, and dropped out again. That's when I was diagnosed with Obstructive Sleep Apnea. I was also mentally evaluated with some BS condition, and put on Risperidone. In another thread, I related how it was the only medication I was allowed. The nurse practitioner put me on lamotrigine at one point, which was amazing (I understand now it's not good long-term, if at all). I would only learn later that she had me increase the dose too rapidly to be safe, and as it happened I was put back on risperidone. My prolactin continued to climb, and it was the last time my testosterone tested about 300, though I don't care to have it tested now. My therapist was useless and the jovial-cynical type; I stopped seeing him for several reasons.
During that period, I also saw an allergist and discovered I had several allergies. The allergist, an astute man of long practice, hadn't seen someone with my strange mix and number of allergies. Seeing as I use a similar nickname on other media, I don't mind listing them: lavender, strawberries, oregano, basil, sage, and tuna. I'm assuming the allergies are why my digestion is so compromised.
By this point I was in my 20s and had no idea why my health wouldn't improve; I was still following mainstream recommendations, which seemed full of holes. Despite my issues, I got a basic job, met a girl, and married her almost two years ago. With her help, I weaned off the risperidone (my last prolactin test before weaning was over 30, T was a bit above 200). I remain somewhat zombified as if I was still taking it. As FrankDee mentioned in a recent psychiatry thread, he compared psych meds to lobotomy, and I certainly feel lobotomized. No compound seems to affect my dopamine, but on rare occasion large amounts (1.2-2g) of caffeine works, but it's not sustainable.
In August of 2018, I was searching DuckDuckGo for silly (or maybe not) phrases about doctors and current medicine being foolish guesswork. I ended up here and spent my days off reading. Soon after, I quit my job. I couldn't eat even 2000 calories a day working a physical job due to a hiatal hernia, despite losing most of the extra weight and following other protocols (luckily I read what Haidut said about PPIs and only used one for 2 days).
There isn't much that helps me with CO2 (which was nearly zero along with NO when I got tested for allergies). Thiamine makes me feel awful as a supplement (from OJ is great though). Famotidine helps, I take 40mg a day but more makes me super sick. Increasing NO, which isn't considered Peatish, makes me function. For the near future, because I can't be picky, I'll be continuing with citrulline and agmatine. The theobromine in dark chocolate helps enough where I don't also take arginine anymore. I can't stomach enough fat from dark chocolate, though I love it, to get the vasodilating effect from it alone. I've read threads here and what Ray says about NO, so my current goal is to stop needing the stuff. That said, NO production alone or high potassium intake alone don't get my kidneys working as well as the two together. Also, without increasing NO my digestion remains at a near standstill. It's the only think that gets my digestion moving without inducing obscene amounts of diarrhea.
I don't seem to tolerate any decent amount of salt. I love salt. But if I have much at all (more than 1g a day), I get super flushed, my nose closes up, and my breathing becomes greatly compromised. My mood darkens even before the respiratory functions change. Anger follows, then restlessness and ADHD-like symptoms. I'll eat a salty meal, to taste, and spend the evening wondering why 1-3 hours have passed every time I look at a clock.
Low potassium has landed me in the emergency room once for sure, though I suspect another time as well. A ratio of 5g:1g, potassium to sodium, is what I'm working with right now. Up until this week, it was about 4:4. With the new ratio, I dumped a bunch of extra water. I can see my jawline, and can feel the ridge at the back of my skull; this for the first time since I was 20. Sometimes throughout the day, I can do something besides remain sedentary. Pulse went from low (~40bpm) or high (~110bpm) erratically to a consistent 90bpm. The change in sodium intake is also the only thing that stopped the bloating I had for the last 6 years.
If I recline too long, I can become immobile, which happens more easily with less potassium and/or more sodium. Apparently, a condition exists where those with it who recline a certain amount can cause potassium levels to drop to almost nothing or zero, but the amount in the body stays the same; this causes loss of muscle tone and even muscle damage if it happens enough. Considering my pulmonologist can't see a reason I have OSA (he also doesn't know how I'm alive since I was waking up once a minute at night; seems to be one of the good ones), this is the theory I'm working with. I have slept without my CPAP face down, but I have to use to thing a certain amount each night or I lose it due to non-compliance. The best sleep I had in recent memory was before the machine, I was on D3 and calcium for my SAD. My doctor then told me to stop taking them and that bad things would happen if I didn't.
This reclining-potassium would make sense for me, as it would explain my growing weakness over the years, as well as my CPAP issues. If the CPAP pressure is enough that I can sleep on my back, I wake up alert but not refreshed (probably adrenaline). At that pressure, in any other position I swallow too much air and can't sleep. If the pressure is low enough for other sleep positions, and if I end up on my back, I wake up with my throat open (no sputtering like without the machine during back sleep, contrary to my diagnosis), but I feel as if I went without the CPAP at all. I can feel my throat is open, but for whatever reason I wake up with the same headache as without it. The difference in pressure between the two is large, 20ish for being able to sleep on my back, 7-9 otherwise. My insurance doesn't cover BiPAP and I can't afford one. Losing weight hasn't helped, though I'm glad I have, also put on more muscle.
My current routine is lots of rest and the following diet:
Beef liver for breakfast, with the only caffeine I have, either Red Bull of coffee.
Followed after by berries (red raspberries right now) with maple syrup.
OJ throughout the day, sometimes with dark chocolate; usually about 60oz OJ, 1-2 oz dark chocolate. Skim milk when I can stomach it, 6-18oz. Both better than when I started.
Lunch is whatever meat I have, usually beef, more OJ, and either fruit and maple, or dark chocolate according to craving.
I do better on high protein, but can't have much caffeine if I do. Always pee clear if either is high or much of either together. I miss having more coffee, but it's too harsh.
Nettle tea if I start to feel kidney pain, 4-12oz total, usually only twice a week. It does seem to be estrogenic, but my overall health improves enough for the tradeoff. If I don't filter well enough, I get worse estrogenic/serotonergic symptoms within a day. If I can maintain high enough potassium levels, I'll experiment with eliminating it for a week.
If I need more protein, I have it for dinner. Warm milk for protein is better for sleep, even skim, so I usually drink more milk at night than day but the amount is far off of what Pet recommends.
I have gelatin, but don't use it often. It makes me feel nauseous and constipated. Also can't sleep if I have it, even in the morning. I'll feel calm for an hour and then like crap for at least 24hrs after.
Starch doesn't agree with me. Potatoes can in small amounts deep-fried, but it's not worth the trouble to do it myself. Well cooked noodles or potatoes result in day/night long heartburn and digestive slowdown. I know Ray says starches should be avoided, but the extra calories can be tempting, as well as the potassium and protein from potatoes. Also, fruit is poor quality and generally expensive.
I'm also concerned because the right side of my throat feels numb around my thyroid. Need to find out if it's a nodule. My mom and her mom had thyroid problems. I'm not sure if I want to mess with anything, T3 doesn't seem to have an effect and I'm not clear on what to try that will be benign if it's not a nodule.
TL;DR
Current goals:
*Get enough vasodilation so I don't have to mess with NO.
*Get potassium up enough so I can function properly
*Get sleep figured out
*Consume enough macros at the least, try to get calories above 2000 without starch
*Current diet is red meat, liver, dark chocolate, OJ, skim milk, lots of fruits, maple syrup
*In general, break lifelong stress cycle
*26 year old guy, 5'7" about 160 but feel 50+ and much heavier
*Find out if throat problem is scar tissue or thyroid nodule
*Figure out why salt wrecks me, even according to cravings
*No recent tests due to several problems with insurance; local doctors also typically refuse to test me